Stupidfuture: Obscure Sci-Fi Parodies

Those who fear the future are largely afraid to laugh at it….

Archive for the ‘Battlestar Galactica’ Category

BSG Finale: Cavil Orders Pizza

Posted by gregchiaramonti on March 24, 2009

BSG Finale: Cavil Orders Pizza

Well, it’s finally over. Somewhat. Still another two-hour special, and then a new prequel series about some fembots or something. I thought the big finale, “Daybreak 1 & 2” was pretty cool. It definitely tied up things on an emotional level, and the action was great. The (spoilerz here, yo) Galactica ramming the Cylon Colony/Retirement Home for Active Classic Centurions was pretty awesome. Very Star Blazers-ish. And then Cavil entering the Galactica with Centurions was so “Vader boarding the Blockade Runner-ish”, I kept expecting Gaius Baltar to be sporting one of those silver streamlined bike helmets like the Rebel troops.

Cavil making the call on the phone to end the war just cracked me up completely. I mean, how did they know how to “patch him through” to the Cylon Colony? Is the phone number listed? Does the Cylon on the other end just trust that it’s really Cavil calling on some old corded analog phone from Galactica? Just thought it was a real WTF moment.

I like how Starbuck says “There must be some kind of way out of here” before she enters the All Along the Watchtower note number coordinates into the FTL computer. Those are actually lyrics from the song… cool.

As far as all of the mystical stuff, I think it was left open enough to interpret as either God or maybe just a more highly evolved entity running the show, hanging out with Head Six and Head Baltar, temporarily resurrecting Starbuck and so on. Maybe this same entity had seeded many worlds with similar, compatible life. Still, though, a lot of holes in the final resolution there, when you really think about evolution – not just biological, but cultural/languages, etc. And, really, all of those starships into the Sun? Just using them for scrap metal and shelter in the least would have made more sense. Oh well, it was a neat image, and the original 70’s fanfare in that scene was nice.

Thought they came very close to breaking the “fourth wall” in that last scene in NYC, with the awkward cameo of producer Ron Moore and Head Six and Head Baltar wandering about on holiday.

Overall, I enjoyed the ending and glad to see that the show didn’t just continue on forever and then fade away without resolution.

So say me, y’all…

– Nigel Matrix

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Posted in Battlestar Galactica, New BSG, Television Parodies | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Mr.T vs. Captain Apollo

Posted by stupidfuture on February 15, 2009

Colonial Warriors Fail to Recognize Similar Fashion Excesses

Colonial Warriors Fail to Recognize Similar Fashion Excesses

It’s got to be nepotism, really.  How else could Captain Apollo have gotten promoted?  Sure, he was a faithful “company man” and always ready to follow dog-food slinging Ben Cartwright’s orders.  But honestly, his character was written as a bit slow on the uptake.  A good man, certainly, but not the brightest cog in the mighty Battlestar machine.  Starbuck, his good pal of questionable morals, not only was a better card player, but also seemed quicker on the draw and a lot more skilled in tactics and flying a Viper.  So did Boomer.  So did Sheba.  Heck, so did Jolly…and he couldn’t even make Lieutenant (err, there might have been a weight requirement).  For all his extra salary and responsibility under Daddy Adama, Apollo never lost that “gee whiz” attitude toward life.

Mr. T, on the other hand, never seemed to have a “gee whiz” vibe at all.  He rarely smiled, and his public persona in the media was largely all action and anger.  So much so that he became an Internet legend, and the “Mr. T vs.” online phenomena was born.  Long before LOLcats, Photoshop was weakening Western Culture by allowing the creation of online comics showing Mr. T fighting everybody.  They’re all the same, of course.  Mr. T drives the van, beats up bad guys, and saves the Youth Center.  He proclaims that either he, or his van is “Hella Tough”.   Barney, Pokemon, Space Ghost…pretty much anybody you can think of.    It’s kind of mind numbing and hypnotic, and once you open one, it’s hard to quit.  But think about it, if you had to pick someone to whoop everyone in the universe, who better?

Mr. T, of course, initially garnered much of his fame from The A-Team, playing opposite Dirk Benedict, fresh from his halcyon (Ha! Cylon?) Galactica days.  He wore a lot–and I mean, a lot–of gold chains, the weight of which would crush a lesser man.  But, if you think about it, the Colonial Warriors were pretty blinged-out, too; losta clasps, pins, patches, gold trim, capes…so who are they to judge?  Granted, Apollo wore his feathers as emblems sewn into his shirt instead of dangling from an earring loop, but if I had to put my money on one of them, I’d say it was Mr. T who probably figured out the right way to accessorize.  Oh, yeah, and “TR3”, on Mr. T’s belt buckle is the name of some kinda car wash or polish he was hawking back in the 80s.  The TV commercial is findable online, and T says of the product in question: “Goes on easy, stays on hard.  Makes your car beautiful, like me.”

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